Product Review:Kerasal

Eleven years ago while pregnant I made the mistake of painting my toe nails early in my pregnancy and failed to take it off before my stomach became too big. The last thing I thought would be a complication at that time would be discolored toe nails. It took a bit of time to develop. It developed dermatophytes, turned yellow and cracked in several locations on both big toes.

Luckily nothing ever spread but because dermatophytes eats the keratin, the nails stops growing. I originally figured it would groe out but after a long time without and progress I looked up the cause. After discovering the root of it I went to the pharmacy for a product to help.

The first product I picked up was a medication in a pen. It had a brush tip that by pressing down would release the medication which then would be applied to the surface of the nail. It seemed easy enough so I bought it.

At first it seemed easy to apply and I thought I had found my solution. Unfortunately, it started to smell after 2 uses. It honestly could have smelt from the start but I was battling a sinus cold. I worked past the smell but I started getting headaches. Then I would become nauseas and after applying the product I started getting stomach issues. Weird, I know. How could this be related? I'm unsure but after two months of use I had to stop.

I felt much better so after several months of abandoning this treatment I decided to try again. Instantly, my symptoms returned so I stopped again and threw the product away. I gave up with the idea of using an over the counter solutions assuming all the solvents would be the same.

I began trying every home remedies I could find online. I did everything from apple cider soaks to putting Vicks Vapor Rub on my toes. The Vicks rub actually showed signs it could work but the time it needed was a minimum of a year more depending on how long you've had it. By this time it was nearing the decade mark. After a year of minimal progress I was done trying and was looking into paying for expensive laser treatments.

The progress the Vicks had made was gone, taken back by the dermatophytes. Walking through the pharmacy one day looking for a knee brace for my husband I saw the store brand equivalent to Kerasal. This store happened to be out of the actual Kerasal. I took a chance and bought it.

From the start I noticed this was different. It was not smelly, no headachs, no tummy problems, no side effects. I used one tube for a few weeks. It did show improvements within the two weeks as advertised on the box. But after my three year old got ahold of it and used it on paper thinking it was glue, I had to buy more.

I bought the store brand again even though the Kerasal gives one week and you will see improvements. But I knew this worked and it was a bit less than the actual brand. That lasted the three months it said it would. Though that should take care of a simple case, after 10 years I don't think mine is a simple case anymore. 

After that I bought the Kerasal the brand. I was now at the supermarket and bought my only option. Thank goodness I decided not to wait to return to the pharmacy. Kerasal worked far better with faster improvements. That was only 2 weeks ago and I see a difference. 

I have only been using this treatment (both the store brand and the Kerasal since May.) It hasn't been 4 months yet but I'm happy with the progress. I'm about a fourth of the way cured of the dermatophytes. I've included a photo comparison of my first day starting this treatment and a picture of where I am, nearly 4 months later.

I know the top photo is a bit blurry but that was on my old phone. The coloring is accurate and you can see how low that crack was. Now, as you can see the crack has grown out on the right foot and the left is close to the top. I'm finally seeing growth, and that purple coloring at the base of the nail is actual healthy nail. The yellowing has faded as well. I finally feel comfortable wearing sandles and open toed shoes. I recommend the Kerasal, it really does work!

Asthma happens

I could just copy the same post from January and post it here and it would be accurate. Last week, Freya was in the hospital again for asthma. It surprised me that it happened so soon after the first hospitalization. But asthma is unpredictable so we have to carefully watch our children closely especially at an age when they can't advocate for themselves. I hope my stories will help other moms (dads, or guardians) to advocate for their children. Sometimes things are dismissed when the doctor doesn't know your child. As parents, we must insist things be at least looked into.
Lets start at the very beginning. It was again a Monday, (ironic, I know). My husband was out of state for five days so I was spending most afternoons at my parents house. Freya was playing with my youngest niece in the living room. Though Freya had a few moments where I had to wipe her nose but it wasn't that bad. But my brother noticed her nose was running a lot more. I didn't think much of it. Kids get runny noses.
That night Freya was restless. It was obvious that the mucus was going down the back of her throat. Post nasal drip usually takes more than one night to cause a problem, even for an asthmatic. By the morning and Morrigan was off to school I noticed Freya not breathing well. I gave her a breathing treatment and she seemed in good spirits. I had to wait an hour until the doctors office was open. Freya had strep throat at the time so I wanted to make sure her tonsillitis weren't causing problems for her. Then I noticed her stomach and a pulling behind the ribs. Its hard to describe but you know it when you see it. It looks like her breathing is causing her chest to almost ripple. That's when I knew it was better to bring her to the ER at this point. I gave her another breathing treatment and I called my mom to ask her to come with me. I figured if she needed a chest x-ray then I needed an extra pair of hands. In the meantime I got ready to go. I check on Freya and find that she had crawled up on my bed and laid down. This behavior was unlike her, she had just woken up a little over two hours prior and her skin was pale. I knew she was getting worse by the minute and breathing treatments are not working. I called my mom and told her she was either coming now or I was going without her.
Luckily, she is three minutes down the road. She must have just put the petal to the metal to get there because I took Freya outside (cold air helped me when I had my near death asthma attack five years ago.) I walked down maybe ten feet from my front door and Freya threw up. It was just mucus that came up but it showed the cold air was opening her up enough to cough it up. Right after she threw up, my mom pulled up. We threw her in the car seat and went straight to the hospital. We live less than ten minutes from the hospital if we hit all the lights. I looked at Freya and her skin has no color at all and her lips are turning blue. At this point, we would make it to the hospital faster than if we pulled over and waited for an ambulance. So we drove on, cutting through parking lots to avoid lights. We made it there in five minutes.
I walk in to the ER and explained how serious the situation was. I have had great experiences with this hospital before, but this day, the ER had angered me with the lack of response. I know they have to teach students and new staff members their job but not as my toddler is struggling to get oxygen. It took them forever to check her in. My mom had parked and joined me inside and as we stood there waiting we both agreed, pulling over and waiting for an ambulance would have gotten her in fast because these guys couldn't seem to print a ID bracelet. I was loosing my mind. Then they asked us to wait in the waiting room. I was looking at my completely lethargic daughter hoping she can wait before passing out from lack of oxygen.
Once the nurse calls us in for vitals I already could tell it wasn't going to go well for us. Just like before, the nurse said she couldn't get a ready on her. She changed the devices and still they couldn't get a read. So I asked what the problem and her numbers were too low to be real. I assure her it was, it happened last time. She didn't seem to believe me but she put her on oxygen and asked me to sit a wheel chair and hold her on my lap. An elderly man was in the waiting room asking for oxygen. One nurse asked our nurse what the guy wanted (the whole ER heard him begging for oxygen) and our nurse said "He wants oxygen but he's fine. He just wants attention." My mother and I just looked at each other in shock. Obviously there is a problem with the ER staff here but Freya needed medical attention now and couldn't wait the 40 minute car ride to the other hospital.We sat in the waiting room in panic.
They brought us in, luckily Freya was responding to the oxygen as her color came back to her lips. We met the ER doctor right away. He called the hospital pediatrician and ordered a breathing treatment and steroids. Even on oxygen her levels were dancing around the high 80s for O2. Her heart rate was really high as well. She was struggling and her O2 again was so low the nurse thought there was something wrong with the devices instead of her being that low. She just doesn't show most of the physical signs of distress. I don't know how her blue lips didn't concern the first nurse. We were next door to the older gentleman from the ER. When he came in I heard the nurse (who had to talk loud as he seemed hard of hearing) say "So, you're on oxygen at home?" This was the guy would was begging for oxygen that the nurse dismissed was him just seeking attention. I was so angered by that original nurse.The other nurses and medical staff was beyond helpful and kind. They joked with Freya as she refused to talk. It might of been too difficult for her. But her nurse joked that the medicine took her voice away and with a shake of her head Freya agreed.
Maybe 15 minutes after the steroids were given Freya vomited pure clear, thick, mucus. I had never seen anything like it. It was just like she had swallowed a whole container of that rubber glue I remember from school and it was now spitting it out. The poor thing gagged so much trying to get it all out. She was so concerned about expelling it onto her blanket she cried but once the nurse gave her a new one she relaxed. Apparently, that cleared up her lungs pretty good. There was still a wheeze but it wasn't nearly as bad as it was when she first arrived.
The pediatrician was quick to arrive and recognized us by our time in November for Freya's first asthma attack. She was very knowledgeable and helpful. She set up a plan and came back just when she said she would to check on Freya's progress. It didn't take long for her to decide Freya needed to stay. She admitted us and had a bed in the children's ward rather quickly. The vomiting had relaxed and tired Freya so much she fell asleep. She slept through the transport upstairs until we had to switch beds.
Once she was upstairs in the room she started talking and boy did she talk. The nurse had two student nurses with her. Freya showed them her cat scratch and told them how she pulled Pumpkin's tail and she scratched her. She introduced me and my mom and told them my real name. My actual name is something I had recently taught her so she is proud to show that off. Also she told them how to spell her name and she has an older sister and her daddy is a work (she didn't really get him being out of state to visit family). My mom left and picked up Morrigan bringing her home to get stuff for an overnight at her house and putting together a bag for me for my stay with Freya in the hospital.
Even with oxygen, her numbers dipped low while she slept setting off the alarms all night. After breathing treatments her heart rate also caused the alarms to go off. Never mind all the times she started pulling off the stat monitor. She also go breathing treatments every two hours all night long. She was wide awake well after midnight to the surprise of the nurses. There was no sleeping for either of us. It put Freya in a bad mood and me too tired to handle her. It was hard not having my husband home.
That morning I got a call from my mom concerned about Morrigan's breathing. Her mild cough became severe overnight. Nothing was calming it and she was struggling. I called the doctors as soon as it was open and set up an appointment for her. My parents took Morrigan to her appointment while I counted the minutes for an update. The doctor was reluctant to give Morrigan steroids. She had only seen Morrigan once so far and hadn't seen her for her asthma so she didn't feel comfortable giving her steroids right away. She said if Morrigan wasn't better by Friday (It was Wednesday) then bring her back in.
My parents came up in the late afternoon with Morrigan. Her sister was thrilled to see her sister and the whole nurses station was like "So this is Morrigan, we heard so much about you!" The shift change came another familiar face. The girl from respiratory from our first visit (the woman with patience of a saint) came in and recognized Freya right away (not always a good thing. lol) She was surprised by how big she got and how much hair she has now. That woman was amazing and so sweet to Freya. We were happy to have her again. We were down to a breathing treatment every 3 hours and the pediatrician said once she handled being off oxygen and staying in the high 90s in O2 she could go 4 hours between treatments. After two treatments four hours apart she would be able to go home. That would put us leaving between 5 and 6.
Hubby was on his flight home and would be arriving home around 10 that night. Things were finally going to be normal again. Or so I thought. Freya was discharged and we were picked up by my parents with Morrigan in tow. We all returned home and I sighed with relief. That feeling of relief didn't last long. After dinner Morrigan's cough was so constant I could see she wasn't able to suck in air after. Her lungs were in spasm though that is not asthma related, her asthma prevented her lungs from relaxing fully. This was causing small short lived asthma attacks. It was only going to lead to a large attack and that can leave scaring in the lungs. I knew she needed steroids and we weren't waiting for the doctor's the next morning. She would be in the ER with a major attack in some ridiculous hour of the night, I know her and her asthma. I know I keep saying how I know better than medical professionals and that sure makes me sound like I'm over reacting. But if you take in to account how many times I listened to my better judgement and ended up right I will continue to listen to those gut feelings over the medical professionals that don't know my children. Asthma is so unpredictable and nothing goes 100% text book. Everything depends on knowing the child and how their asthma affects them.
My poor husband walks in the door at 10 p.m. to me asking him which he would rather do, stay at home with Freya and I take Morrigan to the ER or he can go with Morrigan? He was kind to me and took Morrigan knowing I just came from for 2 days in the hospital. I really didn't want to go back. He has handled her ER trips before so I had confident he could handle it. He texted me updates the whole time and remembered a doctor's note for school. The difference the steroids made for Morrigan was huge. She came home in the early morning barely coughing. I was so relieved!
It was a tough week but we made it, somehow. It's important to advocate for your children and follow your gut. Know your children's asthma as much as you know them. Help them find the right words to vocalize what they are feeling so you better understand their situation. It is just as important for your child to learn about asthma as much as you do. Best of luck to all the Mamas out there with asthmatic kiddos. I feel yah!

Mommy Knows Best

This past November we had a scary moment for our family. Freya was in the hospital for a few days after taking a major asthma attack. As a mother of an asthmatic child already, I had been down this road before. It doesn't make it any easier. It doesn't matter if your child is taking her first asthma attack or her 25th. I hate every second of it. I'm a severe asthmatic myself so I know what its like to feel like your drowning with no water. Your lungs tighten until you can't speak anymore and your panicking.
We started out going to a walk in clinic. It was Monday which is dance class night with our oldest daughter, Morrigan (11). We were all in the car waiting in the parking lot which was unusual. My husband normal takes our oldest to dance because little miss Freya can't sit still and be calm during dance class. So, to not disturb the two classes going on, its best to keep Freya home and that usually means I stay home. Freya was bouncing around the car but she was getting winded and needing to take breaks which is unusual for the human energizer bunny. When I started to buckle her back in I noticed her breathing was really labored. This sets off those mommy alarms that have yet to fail me. My husband, who usually is a wait and see kind of guy knew if there was one thing I was certain about, it was breathing problems. He went inside and pulled my oldest out of dance class early and we went straight in to the walk in clinic.
Morrigan had a bit of a cough too so while we were there, we got both kids checked out. Morrigan was deemed fine and Freya was looked over, given an x-ray because she was wheezing, given a breathing treatment and sent home. Her X-ray was clear of pneumonia and once she took the nebulizer treatment, her wheeze had stopped. It was a cold night so they couldn't seem to get a read on her oxygen level saying her fingers must be too cold but they said she was fine. We thought that was it, we would be fine. But as soon as we got home and I was playing with her on the floor, her breathing seemed worse.
Growing up an asthmatic, I knew those behaviors that indicate an asthma attack. My mom was the type to point it out and when my brother got asthma, she made sure I could identify those behaviors in him since he was young and often ignored an asthma attack until it was severe. Its such a typical kid thing, they rather play than to get an inhaler. It was the tick cough for Morrigan that first alerted me something was wrong. For Freya, it was her stomach pulling in sharply as she breathed. Small children that are struggling to breath look different than an older child. With older children their chest will seem like its sinking in. With younger children, like toddlers, their stomachs will rise and fall rapidly.
I knew breathing treatments were not going to be enough, she needed steroids. I knew it in my heart, or maybe my gut, which ever part of the body that tells a mom that despite what the professional says, YOU KNOW BETTER. My husband and I were in a disagreement. He didn't think we gave the breathing treatment enough time. By normal standards we didn't. But I have been in countless situations as a asthmatic that if I waited those 4 hours I'd be dead. So, I called the one person I knew would make me feel like I wasn't over reacting, my mom. She is the only other person I know that has been through this as a mom. She had doctors telling her my brother was the worst child case they had ever seen. My mom had been there the several times I was close to death, passing out in the ER waiting room from lack of oxygen. If you could be deemed an expert on experience alone, she would be. She asked me if her lips were really red. I wouldn't think red, I'd think blue from lack of oxygen. Apparently, really red is a sign of an asthma attack too. Freya's lips looked like she had lipstick on it was so red. That was it, I was sold. To the ER we went.
At the ER, again they couldn't get a read on her. It was coming up 90% oxygen level but the nurse said she seemed fine. I was so scared they would put us off and not take me serious. I knew she was worse than she seemed. Then another nurse walked by and looked at her. She noticed her heart rate showed she was really working hard to breath. That's when we were rushed right in. A doctor, an RN, an a CNA met us at the door. They rushed her right in and started on breathing treatments, oxygen, and steroids. The doctor was very understanding and didn't deny it was probably asthma but it was only her second time with breathing problems and the last time was over a year ago. He did say, with the family history, it was most likely asthma. After we discussed the family history and how severe those cases are, he stopped referring to it as acute aspiration. He said that when she is discharged, it will say acute aspiration since this was really the first hospitalization. But I needed to talk to her pediatrician about our options as an asthmatic.
I have to say, ER doctors usually follow the book pretty much to the letter. They rarely make assumptions about long term health and even more rare is the doctor that will confess the book is not always right. I had to fight in the beginning with ER doctors with my oldest. Luckily, my pediatrician at the time was my old pediatrician and knew our family well. She knew my kids would more than likely be asthmatics, its genetic. After the first major hospitalization for Morrigan, we got a nebulizer and meds with a rescue inhaler for when we were out from our old pediatrician. We just changed pediatricians that day as my pediatrician was retiring. I had no idea how this new pediatrician would feel about me insisting Freya was an asthmatic after only two events. We had yet to meet this pediatrician, so I was nervous.
Meanwhile, the hospital moved us to the children's ward. Freya and I stayed there over night. They woke her up every two hours for a breathing treatment. At first, Freya fought it tooth and nail. She screamed, swatted, and twisted her little body to avoid the mask. The woman from respiratory had the patience of a saint to deal with Freya every two hours, all night long. But once her daddy and her sister came to see her, she was thrilled. She was excited and energized even with the little amount of sleep she got. But it was a Tuesday and Morrigan had school. So when Morrigan left, all hell broke loose.
Freya loves her sister, more than anyone in this world. When her sister left for school, she screamed, "My Morrigan! My Morrigan! Bring back my Morrigan!" The nurses came in with coloring pages and crayons, toys from the play room, pudding from the kitchen. Nothing calmed Freya down. She's not the kid that is easily distracted. This kid has a one track mind and she doesn't like to be left out of something. Being stuck in a hospital room was like being in prison for her. She did not like being confined. That was when she started venturing out of her room and running down the hall. We eventually found our way to the play room. As much as she had fun in the play room, there was barely any toys. Plenty of big toys but there were car tracks with no cars and doll houses with no dolls. Freya is lucky, she had a big sister to pack her some toys from home. She was able to play with the toys in the toy room because she had the smaller toys from home. So, if you're getting rid of those Fisher Price Little People, some old Matchbox cars, some baby dolls, kitchen food, etc, check with your local hospital's children's ward to see if they need some toys. I'm sure they end up losing those little toys to the sick kids staying there and can always use more. Our hospital had video game systems for the older kids. They had a PS 3 and a few Nintendo Game Cubes. There were baby toys and crib toys for the tiniest of patients.
My parents came to visit later that evening. Freya was doing well and running from the room straight to the toy room pulling one of her grandparents along with her with a very insistent, "Come here, Papa! Come here." She pulled my mom in first to play then my dad. She was excited to show them all the new toys she got to play with while she was visiting the hospital. One thing can be said about Freya that day, she sure knew how to make the best of it. My parents brought me much needed supplies for myself and bought Freya a little stuffed Rudolph. In the ER, they gave Freya a Christmas beanie baby bear that was white with holy printed all over him. She hugged that bear so tightly through it all. Now her bear had a little friend and they stayed together on her bed and she held those stuffed toys all night.
Freya made such progress, our two night stay turned into a one night stay. They told us, if she continued to have a good oxygen level once they lowered the frequency of her breathing treatments from every 2 hours to every 3 hours then to every 4 hours, then she could go home at 7 p.m. To be honest, I was doubtful. She went from having the alarms going off all night because she would dip bellow 87% oxygen. She couldn't sleep without oxygen and then they were all fine sending her home just 12 hours later. I didn't think her oxygen levels would stay up that long off oxygen. After the whole, "poor reading" thing at the walk in clinic and the ER check in, I wasn't sure I felt comfortable believing the doctors.
When my parents left they made the mistake that they were going to watch Morrigan so my husband can run some errands. Again, Freya screamed for her Morrigan and actually ran out after my parents. A doctor was coming in so the locked door was open. If I didn't grab her, she would have made it out. Now I was out of breath. Luckily, she wasn't! I started my own little tests, saying the ABCs and counting how many breaths she takes during it. All the pauses matched up to the song. Then I had her run from the door to the bed and back again then tested her oxygen level. It stayed about 97%! I was feeling more and more comfortable with the idea we might be heading home soon.
The last dose of steroids was a disaster but luckily the doctor felt comfortable with her going home without that last dose. My husband brought in some McDonald's since Freya loves her "burgas". It wasn't long after we ate that the doctor came in and gave the okay for Freya to be discharged. What a relief! But its not like I slept that night. No, of course I sat up all night watching her breath. There were no more monitors watching her oxygen level, no nurses checking on her, no oxygen blowing on her all night. It was all her and I felt like I had to take the place of those monitors.
The great news, she did fine after that. She continued to cough but not wheeze. The cold that triggered the asthma was still there but she was no longer struggling to breath. A few days later we had our follow up appointment with the new pediatrician. To my relief she too felt with the family history, she had no problem labeling what happened to Freya as an asthma attack and if this continue to be a problem she would put her on a controller medication if I felt it was necessary. We both agreed it was too early for a controller medication but it was great knowing the doctor wouldn't have a problem with it, if and when we get there.
Although this was a scary moment for us, it went pretty easy. Moral of the story, don't ignore those feeling that you, the parent, know better. My old pediatrician always used to ask, "What do you think, Mom?" because she was a strong believer that parents just know their children. Parents know when their kids are acting different. They know when something just isn't right. Even if the parent was wrong, at least she would tell you why and ease your fears. That's what I've always loved about my pediatrician and why I am so sad to see her retire. As parents, we really need to feel confident with our instincts. They rarely let us down. I often question myself in fear of overreacting. But its better to overreact than under-react. Sometimes, no, most of the time, Mommy knows best!

Freya is 3!!!

Miss Freya is 3! Its amazing how much Freya has changed but the very core of who she is will never. She is such a fun loving, adventurous, courageous, child that knows what she wants. Our Disney trip was a prime example of how adventurous this little girl is. Where Morrigan was always glued to my side, Freya went running through busy Main Street in the Magic Kingdom with her hands clasped in front of her running at full speed. 

She is such a different kid that it's like becoming a new parent all over again. I had no approach parenting in a completely different way with Freya. She is passionate about what she loves, which is mostly all things Disney. This girl thinks she is Elsa! When meeting Anna at Epcot she was asked if she had ice powers, my husband and I just looked at each other and laughed. She answered exactly how we thought she would, by confidently saying yes, of course I have ice powers. Then she twirled her hands around like young Elsa does in the movie and she saw sparkling magical ice the rest of us aren't privileged to see. Her world is bright with wonder, her imagination is like a blooming flower I hope never wilts. 

As I type this, she is on my lap, dressed as Anna, eating Pez, asking a dozen questions about what I'm doing. She will repeat thing over and over until you repeat it back to her to make sure you really understand her. This girl does not like being told what to do. Her stubbornness knows no bounds. You could be giving her exactly what she likes, food, candy, toys, whatever the case might be. But if she is not asking for it, she wont accept it. When she does get what she is asking for, she is the most grateful child imaginable. I've seen the girl become ecstatic over a hamburger. Imagine, she is sitting at a table waiting patiently for a hamburger. I put the plate in front of her, she takes a loud, long inhale then yells, "My burger! Thank you Momma! Thank you so much! I love burgers! Thank you!" It makes me so happy to see her happy. 

What makes her most happy is her sister. Her father and I are second to her sister as her favorite people in this world. As much as they can argue, nothing makes Freya more happy than having sister time. It could be anything from her sister playing Barbies with her or her watching her sister play her Xbox. Freya cries every morning her sister leaves for school and when her sister leaves for dance. The times Morrigan goes with friends, that's so much worse. She melts in front of the door and cries from being left behind. She things she is 11 too and no one really has the heart to tell her she isn't. Luckily, Morrigan has some pretty great friends that will include Freya often. But preteen girls don't want toddlers around all the time and Freya is too young for her own friends.

Three year old Freya is going to be fun. Her little body will be able to keep up with her big heart and ever expanding mind. All those things last year she was just too little to do will not be so difficult this year. This year will be more climbing, more jumping, more running, and more adventures. I look forward to tried afternoons from chasing my ambitious little girl with the desire to do everything. Look out world, here comes 3 year old Freya!

Morrigan is 11

It amazes me how fast a year can go by. I remember being a child and a year seemed to drag on. Once I became a parent I feel like I blink and a decade has gone by. This time wrap is most evident in how fast my oldest daughter Morrigan has grown.
All those baby toys and toddler size Christmas dresses that were Morrigan's and I have unpacked for Freya reminds me of how Morrigan was at each stage of her childhood. It's a trip down memory lane in a box. That 2T Easter dress reminded me of the Easter Morrigan was running a fever of a 102.6. That was a tough day especially for her. Or the Ariel stuffed toy that Morrigan carried everywhere. Once, when Morrigan was 3 she dropped her Ariel in the middle of the pedestrian only road on Derby st in Salem. Her father and our friends turned back to go find it while Morrigan and I ran to catch the author we were in Salem to meet and have sign my book. We made it there in the very last second before she started her class. That Ariel was recovered, washed, and continued to be her cuddle buddy at night. Now it's in Freya's arms every night.
I sometimes expect that little kindergartener with the missing front teeth to get off the bus dressed in a Disney Princess shirt and leggings covered in tiny pink hearts. Instead, this beautiful pre-teen steps off the bus in her button up plaid shirts and her laced up black boots. She looks so grown up that I have to take a double take to make sure its really my kid.
In the past few years she has really come into her own. She is still shy but she can speak her mind. When she speaks, her vocabulary amazes me. Her understanding of the world and the society we live in is starting to take shape. She's forming her own opinions and backing them up with a fair amount of logic.
At this point, I can say my daughter is a kind, caring, empathetic person who believes in fairness for everyone regardless of race, sex, creed, immigration status, sexual orientation, and political affiliation. She's a feminist at heart, it seems to be her biggest cause. 
So watch out world, my Morrigan is now only 7 years away from adulthood!

How to Survive a Long Car Ride with Children

A long car ride can be exhausting for anyone of any age. Children are usually have the most difficult time since they are little Energizer Bunnies that can't keep still. Having them belted into a car seat is not easy for them and hence, not easy for you, the parents. I've compiled my time tested list of must haves when taking young children on a car long ride.

• Portable DVD Player. The power of a good movie will quite your little munchkin down for over an hour! Arm yourself with your kids favorite DVDs and you too can survive your road trip. I personally own (and love) the RCA 7-Inch Dual Screen Mobile DVD System. I have two kiddos so having two screens with the same movie is helpful so there are no arguements over who gets the screen in front of them. Plus, having the screens headrest mounted means the toddler can't drop (or throw) the DVD player. You can buy them refurbished for only $49.95 from Amazon. And if you're a Prime customer like me, you will love this item has Prime shipping. Check out the link bellow.

• Lovelys. Don't forget your child's lovelys. Having their favorite stuffed friend or their blanky is important for your little one's comfort. Just make sure that they stay safe on your car ride as things often get left at rest stops. Make a rule that stuffed friends must stay in the car. Also, its a good practice to check for your child's lovely before hitting the road after every stop.

• Mess Free Coloring. Pack crayons over markers or get some mess free markers. My toddler loves Crayola's Color Wonder Mess-Free Coloring Books and Markers. There are so many different character themed coloring books and many different color markers. They even sell a travel case which not only holds everything in place but it offers a coloring surface while in the car seat. My suggestion is to load up on many different books and extra markers. Mess free coloring has kept my kiddos busy during trips which saves my sanity as I know they wont get marker covered hands or faces, you can't put anything past a toddler.

• Pillows. Even if you plan on staying at a hotel at night, a pillow can still come in handy. Children often nap in car rides, even big kids. If you child is in a booster or a regular car safety belt then it is best to pack a pillow so they can rest their heads. Its not a bad idea for any adult passengers as well.

• A Cookie Sheet. Sounds strange but cookie sheets are awesome for a car ride. I buy each kid a cookie sheet for things like coloring on or writing in journals. Also you can bring magnets to entertain your kiddos. Cookie sheets are metal and using them to display letter magnets or magnetic puzzles. Your older kids into Minecraft? They can build a Minecraft scene with magnets that resemble the blocks from the game. 

• Reusable Puffy Sticker Sets. These sticker sets worked wonders for my toddler. It would work even better for a Preschooler. I found Disney themed stickers for our resent Disney trip and my toddler got a new set every time she fussed. I brought 3 which worked wonders for the ride to Disney. Next time I will buy 3 more for the ride home as stickers get lost or lint covered. 

• Snack Cups. The most brilliant inventions, snack cups. Especially those straw cups with the snack compartments. If your car seats lack cup holders then you are really going to love the compact design of a snack and drink cup. We usually get ZakSnak Tumblers. They have all kinds of characters from Pokemon to R2D2 and Princess Poppy to Minnie Mouse. We bought Lion Guard and Shimmer and Shine for our toddler who loved the characters which made it seem like a special treat. You can find them at Target or on Amazon. 

• New Character Toys. Kids love receiving new toys. Something new will give your child a whole new world to imagine. I recommend toys your child doesn't already have. If you buy another Littlest Pet Shop and your child has a dozen or more at home, they will loose interest quicker than a whole new toy. And from one mom (and Dad) to another, don't and I can't stress enough, DO NOT buy Legos! No matter how big your big kid is, Legos go everywhere! If you buy a set and those sets needs every stinking Lego piece, I promise you, one will get lost and spoil the whole set. You will have that big kid beside themselves over a single missing piece. Its not fun!

• Snacks! Snacks! and more Snacks! Trust me, snacks of all different kinds are necessary for a long car ride. Make sure you have a variety from pretzels to fresh fruit. As much as I usually like to push the healthy snacks, on a long car ride have a few fun sized candy bars tucked in your purse so when the kiddos are fussing and don't want to sit in the car any longer you had them a fun size Musketeers bar and enough the silence.

• Electronics. I saved this one for last because its usually the most expensive. But having a few games on a tablet or smart phones help. If you have an old smartphone that you don't use load it up with games over your home WiFi. Make sure the games don't need the internet to run and you have a free way to entertain your munchkins with electronics. If you don't have an old phone laying around then get a kid friendly tablet. This may not be as expensive as you think. We've heard good things about Dragon Touch tablets. A few of our friends have them for their toddlers and preschools and they have held up the constant drops from tiny hands. I found a Dragon Touch Y88X Plus 7 inch Kids Tablet 2017 Disney Edition, Quad Core CPU, Android 5.1 Lollipop, IPS Display, Kidoz Pre-Installed with Bonus Disney Content (more than $60 Value) for 68.99. The cases come in a couple of different colors so check them out.

• Camera. Whether its an old point in shoot or a disposable, giving an older child a camera to take their own photos can be a great source of entertainment. Plus, you get great selfies and shots of the kids during the ride without any effort on your part. :)

Hope this list helps. Please leave any other suggestions in the comments bellow. Don't forget to pack some things for the ride home as well. I hope you all survive and enjoy your trips with your children! Stay sane!

Freya is 2!

Where did the time go?
Can't believe this little munchkin is 2 today. My little fiery Freya who loves Frozen, to sing and dance, and can convince anyone to join in on the fun. The world, or at least the toy aisle at Walmart, is her stage. She will sing a Frozen song any chance she can get. She surprises me every day with all the things she does. Today might be her second birthday but she acts like she is 10. She has shown her strong personality since she was 3 months old. This girl walks to the beat of her own drum. As much as she looks up to her sister, she does her own thing. She is my little toughy that can pick herself back up when she falls down, she doesn't take crap from anyone (unfortunately me included), and always willing to try something new. To my tiny little Norse warrior Freya, Happy Birthday!!!♡♡♡

Been M.I.A. for the Summer.

It's been a difficult summer. I had so many plans and it's already the end of July. My oldest returns to school in a few weeks and we've accomplished nothing on that list. This summer has been full of virus after virus. My oldest actually missed the whole last week of school because of hand, foot, and mouth.

It seems like one by one we get sick. Then once we are all better it takes a week for us to get our house back in order. Then we catch something else all together and the cycle continues. I've tried immune boosting vitamins for all of us but the baby. She is still nursing so she get immune boosts from me. But still we keep getting sick.

It's not just things that are contagious. My husband hurt his neck and was unable to turn his head. He had to turn his whole upper body. Poor guy was like that for a week. He still isn't 100%. I went through a case of fatigue so bad I was just falling asleep randomly. I had to fight to stay awake. That lasted for two weeks. That was at the end of May and first week in June.

My birthday was June 1st. I spent it in the emergency room with sever pain in my abdomin. Apparently I was passing kidney stones. The next few days was completely laid up in pain but when my kidney stones pain past so did my fatigue, go figure.

So really since May we've been dealing with this or that. I haven’t had a moment of free time to write a single blog post. I will get back to writing posts after my house gets cleaned, so never. *wink*

It's Free Fun Fridays again!!!

Rather than posting exactly my post from last year with updates, I will spare you the details. However, I will post the 2016 Free Fun Fridays list from the Highland
Street Foundation.

If interested, you can read my post from last year at Battleship Cove http://survivingsah.blogspot.com/2015/07/our-visit-to-battleship-cove.html?m=1

Summer is Coming!!!

We live in New England so while the rest of the country is out of school now, we are still in school and making up snow days. Our school district has the last day of school on June 17th. With tomorrow's temperature reaching 90`f it feels like summer.

It's interesting to hear the difference between parents at the bus stop in regards to the summer break. Some can't wait until they can sleep in and slow down in the morning. Some can't wait for vacations, traveling, vacation homes, and getting things done.

Some dread the summer break. They are usually the ones that would then have to pay for daycare while they work during the day. While some are saving up for a trip to Disney these parents are saving up for camps and daycare so they can continue to work.

We no longer have a community. We no longer have one working parent and one at home. It's rare to see stay at home parents now. So think about all those kids that don't get to wake up when they want, they don't get to run the streets like our generation did. They don't get to eat every meal in the backyard and live in the pool all day.

So, my challenge for those stay at home parents out there is this. Take one of your child's friends who would otherwise go to daycare during the summer for a sleep over during the week. Let them sleep in, serve breakfast outside, spend all day doing fun summer things like running through a sprinkler or have a water gun fight. It's their vacation, help them have a long summer day not just on the weekend. It feels so much better when you know you should be in school but you're free.

We should all be working towards building back a community. Including someone else is a step forward in rebuilding a sense of "us" instead of it always being about "me".

My PSA for Moms

Apparently moms fall into two different categories, laid-back moms or pinterest queen moms. One thinks it's silly and a waist of time to try to make your kids childhood magical. They don't care for the pinterest queen who find laid-back mom lazy. See pinterest queen goes above and beyond to cut every sandwich into animal shapes and build forts out of pvc and weather proof material they special ordered. This back and forth judgements are found in every mommy bloggers page. It's sad that we judge if not this then helicopter vs free range, breast vs bottle, cloth vs disposable diapers, homeschooling vs public schooling, etc.

I certainly don't do no GMO, organic, foods only but I do try to cut back on sodium, and vegetables with high amounts of pesticides but I don't sweat it. I do watch my kids like a hawk but I make them order their own food (when Freya can talk she will) and have moments that they get the independence they need to be adults someday. I love throwing themed parties but I enjoy it, I don't feel obligated. I use what I have for projects because I'm teaching my kids how to be resourceful and make do with what they have. We reuse things and value what we have rather than always making a fuss about the latest and greatest.

I don't think mom's should be one way or the other but rather we should walk somewhere in the middle. Childhood is fleeting and if we can make it fun then we should but there should be a lesson there one that teaches children how to see things differently and be creative. Guide children don't force them, don't do it all. Hold their hand and show them what they need to do. Those memories will be just as important to you as it is for them. So don't sweat it, magic can happen in the simplest act of giving them your time and attention. Put down the phone, step away from the computer, leave pinterest alone and use your own imagination and just be mom!

Memories Are Funny Like That

I'm writing this post because I'm the type of person that thinks symbolically. I see the patterns within the chaos that is life. My measurement of time is not based on days, weeks, months, years, but rather moments of related coquidences that seem to happen within a single stretch of time.

Today, there has been a theme, all conversations and thoughts have all brought me to the subjects of memories. From conversation at the bus stop to Facebook friends clear across the country, there seems to be that people are reflecting and recalling deeply buried thoughts they had nearly forgotten about. It's interesting how people that have no way of knowing each other are talking about similar things all within the subject of memories. My own thoughts have been triggered to think about memories though out today.

Today started out a difficult day. After a busy week and a even busier weekend I had fallen behind on my house work. My little girl had been restless all night keeping Mommy and Daddy wake all night. I struggled to start my Monday more so than my usual Monday. Once my oldest was off to school I was faced with the daughting task of cleaning a pile of dishes from entering friends last night and with four kids in a small space things  got messy with the toys. I also had a mountain of laundry and a little girl that didn't want to be put down. I could only handle so much screaming! I had to call for reenforcements!

It was Nana to the rescue! She arrived with coffee and donuts! Just what Mommy needed, coffee! The donut actually got the little Miss to sit in her highchair so cleaning could get done. Also, I was out of dishwasher soap so she brought a bottle with her so I wouldn't have to hand wash all those dishes. Hurray!

My mom is great! She can clean anything in no time. What I thought would take hours upon hours to do took 45 minutes. Between scrubbing dishes and folding laundry we talked about so many things, politics, food, my parents remodeling their house. But the topic we discussed the most was memories. Her memories, my memories, things we did together. It's one of my favorite things to do is reminisce with my mom. It keeps those memories fresh and vibrant in my mind.

Strangely, I received a message from my friend that I met at work over a decade ago asking if I remember the name of a co-worker from 10 or 11 years ago. It wasn't someone either of us talked to often so she wasn’t someone I would have remembered anyhow. I remembered her face and some facts about her but her name escaped me. He said this co-worker was in his dream last night and he can't remember her name for the life of him. He had nearly forgotten this girl but deep in his subconscious he remembered her and that is why she could be recalled for his dream. It's strange how we both remembered her likes, what she did after work, the time she colored her hair red, or that she worked specific days during the week yet we couldn't remember her name.

After my mom left, the little one was taking a nap and hubby took the oldest to dance class I opened up the living room window to let in some fresh spring air. It's the day after May day which bring my attention to the changing scenery out my window. The maple tree outside my window has the first signs of leaves poking out of those tiny yellow flowers that broke free of those buds I waited to see all winter. There is change in the air and it smells earthy and rich. The rain water is slowly dripping from the tiny leaves and following down onto the alley way below my apartment window. It brought me back, for that moment to a time when I was seven years old living in the city of Boston in a apartment. It was a flash of a memory, what the view from my living room window was 26 years ago. I remember then watching rain drip off of fresh spring maple leaves falling to the cement parking lot below and smelling that fresh earthy smells of spring showers.

It's funny how your brain can take you back to any given moment triggered by anything really. All these thoughts about memories made me think, how will my children remember their childhood? I think back to moment, like during my oldest daughter's first few years of life. We were so much more spontaneous then. We got do things with little planning and find fun things to do that didn't require much at all. We hiked trails, we drove to historical sites, we would walk the beach. But that changed as our life changed and for a moment I forgot how different and simpler things were then. Now our time is scheduled and limited. My little girl is growing up with a completely different type of parents then her sister did. We can no longer stay out late or do much during the week because of her sister’s school and her father's work schedule. Things are different and I nearly forgot that.

With all this thought surroundings the subject of memories I figured I would write it down. Something is pointing me in the direction of self reflection. Maybe there is a lesson in the past that needs to be revisited now in my life. During such a time of change and growth I would not doubt the universe was trying to get my attention and my brain is seeing something that I have to explore deeper. I hope all of you out there surviving staying at home take a moment to reflect and see the simple beauty in the mysteries of life.

The Amazing Way I Cleaned Grout!

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Moving into my apartment I did what I thought was enough to clean the tiled kitchen and bathroom. I used a mop and some floor cleaner thinking it was enough. I figured my floors were clean and there wasn't much for deep ground in dirt, BUT I WAS WRONG!

I decided to try something I read online to clean the grout in the kitchen. After a painting craft I got some paint stuck on the grout that I hoped to loosen with a good cleaner. I used Lysol toilet cleaner just along the grout lines between each tile. I let it sit for a small while and the results were shocking!

This WAS my tiled kitchen and what I thought was dark grout.

I was shocked that just wiping away the cleaner revealed this....

OMG! What a difference!


My first impression was "Wow! the grout looks great!" then I went "Oh, how gross! That's been sitting on my grout all this time! Ewww!" Next thought was, "Better do the bathroom!"

This was the bathroom...

Want to clean your grout like I did, check out my video...




Needless to say, I completely recommend this! However, make sure you do a little bit at a time. Its messy to wipe up and the smell can get overwhelming. My kitchen and bathroom is very small so I was able to do it all at once. Also, there is research that says that these types of cleaning solutions are very harmful so be extremely careful to keep children far away and make sure the area is well ventilated. I also recommend using gloves. I used gloves except during the video because my gloves were blue and it seemed odd. But it is important to remember safety first!

Raising My Daughter Is No Different Than You Raising Your Son!

My oldest daughter in her Easter dress

My oldest daughter at 13 months

I often hear (and heard when my oldest daughter was little), "Well, at least you have it easy, she is a girl." Or "You are going to have so much fun dressing your daughter up and doing her hair." I believed this with my first daughter. My first born, Morrigan, was that stereotypical little girl that loved dolls and tea parties. From the moment she learnt to walk she walked with grace and poise. She twirled in dresses, loved pretty hats, and a simple song would quiet her down in a heart beat. My oldest posed perfectly for photos for as long as can remember. Her hands were always clean and her face was rarely messy as she used to raise her little hands in the air for me to wipe them clean before she even had words to ask. She was that little girl that everyone thinks a little girl should be. I assumed that this was because she was a girl. This timid, shy, quiet, calm, cautious child was the result of the influence of her gender.

How naive I was!

Being a girl doesn't mean my daughters should be any certain way. They don't HAVE to love dresses, or their hair being done. They don't HAVE to pose pretty or keep their face clean. They don't HAVE to sit still and play with dolls. They don't HAVE to be cautious and compliant.None of those things should ever define a girl!

Yet we have certain standards for each gender. Girls should have tea parties with their dolls and boys should race around the house with their super hero action figure screaming wildly. What I have learnt from my youngest daughter is those "standards", those stereotypes are incredibly false! Some boys will rather sit still and play quietly and some girls will make your heart jump into your throat when they jump off the couch because they think they can fly.

My youngest daughter

My youngest daughter, Freya,

Still and quiet

is that kid, that girl that doesn't act "girly". She has always been a bundle of energy. As she gets older this energy increases and I see more of the girl she really is. She is the complete opposite of her sister. Her sister started talking at a very early age and just completely blew me away with how fast she was able to develop an amazing vocabulary. My second daughter just got up and started running at 9 months old. There were not wobbly steps, in a weeks time she was speeding around the living room. She has been climbing all over things since she could crawl. Sitting on her little foam couch she would suddenly throw herself over the back of it. Her face is always messy as she eats like the Beast from Disney's Beauty and the Beast, you know, just drives in face first into a bowl of soup. I don't know whether to hand her a fork or a snorkel. Forget dresses, I can't seem to keep this kid dressed. Its a struggle getting her dressed in the morning then every diaper change turns into an epic battle. At first I was just giving up on getting her pants back on. But then we had developed the "Freya must wear pants" rule after she started taking off her diaper and I had to scrub pee off my rug.

My super hero second born

There is also a difference in the toys she picks. Don't get me wrong, my oldest played with dinosaurs, trains, cars, and action figures. She has many little boy cousins that she grew up closely with so she is no stranger to playing with the boys. But she still always preferred her Princess tea parties and stuff animals.My youngest, however, prefers her cars, her pirate ship riding push toy, and her throwing balls (or anything else she feels like throwing). She races around the living room with her Jake and the Neverland Pirates pirate ship with her stuffed Izzy and Jake's spyglass. She likes pretending to fly like a super hero. I twirl her around in the air with a cape (a towel tucked into her shirt) on her back. She grabs at my legs so I will pick her up and then throws her head back to tell me to spin her around. She loves being tosses and twirled and hung upside while I blow raspberries on her belly.

Laundry wasn't going as planned

Can you find my baby?

You would think having a brand new DSLR camera would mean I would be taking more photos of my youngest than my first. But just as many second children find, the first always gets more photos. I have tried, believe me, but what I get is a big blur. Then came the acting silly instead of smiling. Most of my photos of my youngest is of her sleeping because its the only time she holds still long enough for my shutter to capture the human tornado that is my Freya.



My oldest first words were kitty, girls (her name for the princesses), and baby. My youngest first words are no and stop it! She is just always getting into trouble. My oldest used to climb into her toy box to play. My youngest crawls into her toy box to climb up to the TV in order to smack the screen. She also likes to headbutt the wall when she gets mad. Then there is the attempts of either scaling the baby gate or pushing and pulling until she can pull the gate down as she screams this animal like screech. She is that kid no one wants to babysit, not even my husband is confident enough to be alone with her as she will get herself in trouble at a blink of an eye.


My youngest has shown me that there is no "girl" things or "boy" things. We as a society create the major differences that between genders. I was in a store recently looking in the toy aisle with my girls when we passed a older woman with two boys one I will say was a between one and two years old and the other was about 4 or so. The 4 year old asked for the Frozen play-doh set that was next to us. I heard the woman say that it was a "girly" toy and that he needs to find something in the "boy's aisle" The play-doh was not in the aisle with the Barbies, it was in with all the rest of the play-doh and games. I looked at the set, it had Anna, Olaf, and Sven.They left the aisle and then the boy comes running back. He picks up the Frozen play-doh set and goes running back. Soon the woman returns with the boys and made the 4 year old put it back. She said "I am not buying you a girl's toy, I don't care! Now go pick something out that is a boy's toy. I don't know why you would want a girl's toy." I was shocked that she had such negative things to say, being a woman and all. But this child obviously knew the movie, probably enjoyed it, just because the main characters are girls doesn't mean that a boy can't relate to the story or the characters. I felt for that boy, he really didn't understand what this woman, presumably his grandmother, was saying. He just wanted a play-doh set from the movie Frozen. But again, society creates these separations in genders.

The truth is that children are different, they are as different as every adult. No one can say why a child rather play as a Princess or play as Hulk.Not every child cares whether their hands are clean or dirty. Some children can sit and watch a movie from the moment their eyes can adjust to a TV screen and some gets too anxious sitting still for that long. Some children love reading others rather build a tower of blocks and then smash it down. It all depends on the child. Its not parenting styles, its not gender, its just personality. Children should not be treated differently because of their gender. But I will say that each child needs the room to grow into who they are. You do have to handle each child differently, not all children respond the same way to learning, discipline, encouragement, and attention. Parents need to remember that their children are little people with their own personalities. We should hold our children's hands and tell them we will love them no matter what their choices are. We need to stop deterring children away from things based on gender or because we would rather our children do something else. Letting our children be individuals while guiding them safely through life is what parenting should be about. So whether my youngest plays with Barbies or Spiderman that is completely up to her. I will buy what she wants, I will treat her the way she wants, and I will love the differences in my girls. So I might not be able to do my youngest's hair when ever she grows any, I never liked doing hair anyways!